13th August

I haven't seen you in a while.

I haven't forgotten your face yet. The freckle next to your ear. The way your stubble feels at 4 in the afternoon. Watching you sleep with your mouth open ever so slightly. 

It's been a while and yet here you are, whispering your choice as I stand in front of my open closet and wonder which shade of black to put on today. And then again when I choose between sleep and despair. Once more when I trace over the daisy chain tattoo on my ankle you envied. It took a long deep breath and clenched fists and images of bad nights to remind me of your absence. 

I often feel lonely. Immense love for what we were supercedes all else. The universe conspires against me. It makes me think of you and I lie in bed staring at that crack in the ceiling and I feel a sudden ache envelop me whole.

"The perfect words never crossed my mind,
Cause there was nothin' in there but you.
I felt every ounce of me screaming out,
But the sound was trapped deep in me.
All I wanted just sped right past me,
While I was rooted fast to the earth,
I could be stuck here for a thousand years,
Without your arms to drag me out."

Love,

Kanika